Perhaps it was the infinite Universe and the Divine power that collaborated to bring it into my life at just the right time.
All I know is that it fit - it met a previously unrealized need - and it was MINE!!! I consciously decided NOT to share this challenge or my blog - with anyone - not even my kids or husband.
I hoarded this piece of heaven I had found - I hoarded my relationships with all of YOU - hoarded it as would a survivor of some catastrophic event who knew every ounce of water or morsel of food meant another day of life, perhaps. I had found a community who was supportive and encouraging and who challenged me and questioned me and motivated me to be better.
No - I would not noT NoT NOT share this with anyone.
And - selfishly - I reveled in this decision. I needed you and this "space" all to myself.
I STILL DO- but I found myself out on a date with my husband a few weeks ago - (I won't say how long ago the last date had been - but we are talking YEARS, not day, weeks or months). We sat in a darkened lounge listening to really excellent blues and sipping our beers. We found ourselves sharing - GASP - dare I say it - ADULT conversation. We tried hard to not slip into the familiar habit of talking only about our kids or our daily life. As the evening progressed we began to discuss summer plans - and whether the kids, the dog and I would spend a month or so up in Michigan on the lake with my sister-in-law and her family. I mentioned that I might want to find a class to take - pottery? art? maybe writing? Somehow, at this point, it just slipped out: "Last year I participated in this SOLSC during March and I am going to again. I have a blog and I want to write!" What a relief. It felt good. I don't know what I expected - he wasn't shocked or appalled - he didn't laugh at me. He just quietly nodded, asked a few questions, sipped his beer. He agreed I should look for a class if I wanted to.
I have since shared the fact that I am participating in this challenge with my daughter - who is quite interested in seeing my blog. But I told her I wasn't ready to share it yet. Not yet. I still feel the need to keep this mostly to myself - to continue to hoard my time spent with all of you. Selfish - yes, perhaps. But I still need something - something creative - to call just MINE. (I hope you don't mind!) It is nice to know, however, that I have made a step - small, thought it may be - towards calling myself a writer publicly. Thank you fellow slicers for making room for me and letting me keep you to myself for so long.
Quote of the day: I am always doing that which I cannot do, in order that I may learn how to do it.